Since I was wearing pastel coloured Kickers I’ve been aware that my daily moods wildly fluctuate, often without a much-needed four minute warning. I can wake up feeling great until a sly subconscious thought turns me into a honey badger. Then a half hour later I’ll feel like doing the Highland Way. It can be exhausting but it’s a psychological thorn in the flesh (brain?) that I’m now comfortable with.
Sure, I write my no-rules poetic musings sprinkled with a naughty word to emphasise a point and come across as being mentally in a bad place but ironically when I write these words I’m actually really happy in the moment. I’ll squeak with delight having had an idea, fire it on paper, stray bullets welcome, and publish it without re-reading.
My personal golden rule: never edit out the mood of the moment in my writing. Perhaps that’s my USP, unfiltered with no rules or proof reading.
It troubles me at times that I may be perceived as a negative person but people who know me, well, know me! I’m hyper for funfairs, exploring, films, music, precious times and simple living. I’m not all consumed with deep hatred holed up in my bedroom like some keyboard warrior who hates the world. Yes, sometimes I do hate the world but then I’ll be singing Ebony and Ivory by Paul McCartney five minutes later.
I love you… get fucked in one breath. The Borderline.
Writing about your mental health on the world wide web for all to see is a risk. You’ve opened your skull for anyone to have a rummage through your mind. You hope to inspire, encourage, show people they’re not alone, help people in the same situation feel welcome to ask me absolutely anything.
People feel like they can’t talk about their experiences for fear of the worst thing to be exposed to: self-righteous judgement. But that will never happen here in my world wide web because…
MENTAL HEALTH MATTERS
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